# 22: "Don't Follow in my Footsteps, I Bump into Walls..."

So, on to the penultimate leg of this joyous journey...

Having survived Elephant Boot Camp, with nothing worse than bumps, bruises and one slightly bent nose, we find ourselves back in Sen Monorom, happily ensconced in jolly little cabins at The Nature Lodge.



My cabin even had this beautiful, roofless mini rainforest bathroom.

Electricity, gentle rolling hills, no mountains to climb for food, no slavery, back in phone range, with food, coffee, grog, ponies & WiFi available in the oh-so-cute Treehouse Lounge/Bar/Restaurant..

You know why I just loved this place ?

'Cause it's a Bar....

and it's in a TREEHOUSE!!










And it has Hammocks !

AND it's in a TREEHOUSE !!






 The cabins are spread over a few acres and are, with obviously great forethought & planning, separated by 50 metres or so, presumably to lessen the possibility of happy holidaymakers disturbing each other..
Hmmm, nice theory, but with absolutely no background noise, except for the odd mooing cow, noise travels REALLY well over 'gently rolling hills', but more about that later...

Before we got too comfortable, and lazy, to move again, we headed out for a wee tour of the district starting with Bou Sra Waterfalls.

Bou Sra is a 3-step waterfall, about 40kms NE of Sen Monorom, although only the first 2 stages can be seen as the final stage is in thick jungle with no access paths and, apparently, 'dangerous wildlife'..

Nevertheless, the first 2 stages are fairly impressive. 
Stage 1 is about 10 metres high & 12 -15 metres across, depending on the season.

Then there's about 150 metres to the 2nd stage which is about twice as high and from 13 -20 metres wide, once again, depending on the season.

It's also the biggest waterfall in Cambodia

It's a really long drop over the edge, shame we couldn't see the final stage..

After the Falls we stopped at a 'Swimming Hole' on a river that runs behind the Pnong village of Krong Te, 28kms from Sen Monorom.

A very pretty spot where Tara took more beautiful shots - this time of butterflies and brightly coloured dragonflies, 

and the rest of us just relaxed...









By this time, we were starting to feel the need for another caffeine charge.
Well some of us were... ok, ME..I was feeling the need for more caffeine so we headed back along the dusty, red dirt road to a coffee plantation we'd passed on the way out that looked pretty damned impressive.

Lovely little restaurant on the banks of the dam.

And a bloody great slippery dip through the trees and into the dam! 

No end of surprises in this country..

I'm guessing this convoluted construction has something to do with irrigation for the plantation, but I'd need to consult an engineer to verify that....

Great name for a 'CAFFEE' plantation, I thought..

Interesting dishes on the menu...

A couple of strong caffees later and we were on our way to the last stop on our little scenic tour.

Samol Chet - A lookout over the "Sea Forest"

360° view of Jungle-covered mountains.

Home in time for dinner, after which we figured we should celebrate our deliverance from indentured servitude in Paradise with a drink or two. 
The booze-bag was still pretty heavy and we all felt the weight of responsibly to lighten the load...
And there was an awesome Full Moon:
courtesy of Tara...again (the photo that is, not the moon..)

Which I choose to blame for the excessive drinking, singing and laughter, at ever increasing volume, that brought us to a midnight countdown and my 55th birthday.
Great company, great music (thanx Stevi), Pringles, a tasty French Bordeaux & Absinthe, which definitely does make the heart grow fonder - I luv you guys..

So the girls poured me into my cabin sometime in the wee small hours. I know this 'cause that's where I woke up, a few hours later, to the soft sounds of ponies munching grass beneath my window, a splendid sunrise, somewhat cranky neighbours (oops..) and several new bruises..bumping into walls perhaps ??

A day of food, coffee, hammocks, music, books, Baileys & Jameson. The only thing that could have made this day any better would have been hugs from my 3 greatest creations, as it was, it made a near-perfect start to my 56th year.. 

Another spectacular sunset to wind up the day.

Looks so serene, no idea the night would bring a howling wind that actually shook the whole cabin and sounded like it was preparing to lift off the roof.
The cabins are built, to typical Cambodian standard, from planks of timber, raised a metre off the ground, with sizeable gaps between the boards. As Tara so aptly pointed out: "when it's windy outside, it's windy inside."
Showering in my roofless bathroom oasis wasn't quite as enjoyable.. in a mini hurricane!

Which brings us to Monday 31st December. Back in the mini bus for the trip back to Phnom Penh and New Years Eve..

# 21: “ Don't just follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.. ” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

So with these inspiring words of wisdom floating around in my 'not-so trustworthy-after-all' brainpan, we set off on our jungle adventure..

Did I mention I'm becoming increasingly suspicious of the reliability and motives of my Logical Brain? 'LB' has become a great disappointment in recent times.

Creative Brain, on the other hand, was really enthusiastic about this trip; elephants, jungle, waterfalls, rivers, elephants, spectacular scenery,  no weddings for miles and miles in any direction, elephants.. Clearly, 'CB' can become overly focused on 1 or 2 points and, just as clearly, doesn't worry about petty details, like the name of the elephant sanctuary we were going to - The Elephant VALLEY Project.
Yep, that SHOULD have been a significant Clue, that should've been where 'LB' stepped up to the plate, with flailing synapses, shouting: "Warning Warning!!"

 It's a VALLEY and, generally speaking, for those of you who skipped too many geography classes, valleys occur between MOUNTAINS and here we go again...

You know, if I wasn't so sure of Tara's affection, I might suspect these trips had an alternate objective..

After a reasonably relaxing, 6 hr bus trip to Phnom Penh, we jumped into a couple of tuk-tuks for the 5 minute trip to our hotel. 
Being such 'old hands' at this by now, we're all familiar with the habit tuk-tuk drivers have of ALWAYS saying they understand where you want to go AND they know where it is but, since both Nat & Kyra have lived in PP and know their way around, and also being armed with Tara's fluent Khmae, we weren't at all concerned about this cultural quirk - and it really was an entertaining Cook's Tour of all the streets around where our hotel was...
We did, eventually, find it, booked into our comfortable rooms, enjoyed the novelty of a long & luxurious HOT shower and set off for a quiet meal at 'Friends' -  remember that one Jassie girl?
 The only problem was that Tara & Nat first had to find some medications to send back to Battambang on the evening bus and Kyra had to go home to drop her bags off, so Kate and I had to keep ourselves amused for an hour or so and, as luck would have it, Friends serves some amazingly wonderful cocktails...in REALLY big cocktail glasses...we were definitely amused.
We did enjoy a lovely meal, I think, 'cause when the bill came a few hours later and there were 25 cocktails on it,  I realised the whole food-thing cold have been imaginary and I may not have actually eaten at all... 

Up at 5.30am and back into tuk-tuks. I know, I know, we should have walked but we did have some heavy luggage, mostly of the kind that 'clinks' while you walk, so we took the plunge again. We'd left early so we'd have time for breakfast and, more importantly, coffee, before our scheduled 6.30am departure, this time in a minibus. So there we were, in the 2 slowest tuk-tuks in Cambodia, stopping every so often so the drivers could confer with each other, until we were starting to wonder if we were actually going to miss the damned bus altogether! So, no coffee & no breaky..

No Coffee makes Di something something...

As it turned out, departure was actually meant to be 7am (we would've had time to grab coffee..ggrrr), by 7.10 Tara decided to run to the servo across the road to fetch munchies & cans of super caffeinated iced coffees for the now suffering troops.

Tara & Kyra watching movies..

Of course, that's when the driver decided it was time to go. The loud & somewhat frantic screams of "CHOP, CHOP, CHOP!"  from all of us in our best, panicked Khmer, seemed to make him a wee bit cross, but we kept it up with increasing desperation, until he pulled into the servo.. Tara had told him where she was going.

Calm down girls..

With the bus totally "stuffed" with people and baggage so that there was little if any, leg room, no access to the door and one poor man sitting on a little wooden stool in the aisle, we set off on the next leg - 6 hrs to Sen Monorom.

The Green House Hotel....

Never mind about the hotel here, looked good...
on the outside...inside?
Well, we just won't talk about it.


Sen Monorom is the capital of the province of Mondulkiri, the largest yet most sparsely populated province in Cambodia, which lies on the Vietnamese border. It's a sleepy town of around 7000 people, perched on a hillside overlooking the rolling hills of the surrounding countryside.
 Over 80% of Mondulkiri's population is made up of 10 tribal minorities, primarily the Pnong Tribe who live in villages in the forest as well as in Sen Monorom itself. They practice Animism, live in self sufficient farming communities and although more and more of them are learning the Khmer language, there is no written form of their own language.

The roundabout  @ the top of the hill - Sen Monorom

I'm thinking this might come as a bit of a surprise to the Khmer...
Wonder when they have to give it back...

Tuesday morning and we were all up in plenty of time to wander up the hill to get coffee at the cafe/bar where we'd be met by Jack/Jake/Mr Banana - his name is actually Jack but in the Animist beliefs of the local Pnong people, Jak is a Demon, so figuring a little discretion would go a long way in gaining their trust & cooperation, he made the slight vowel-shift to Jake, which, in Khmae, means banana...  

Jack - courtesy of Tara's artistic expertise.

One more minibus & a half hour trip to the relaxing splendour of our rainforest accommodation at the Elephant Valley Project...
hahahahahahahaha

Nat, very fittingly, christened this place of beauty & wonder - so welcome to Nat's

 "Elephant Boot Camp"

So Logical Brain, is there anything you'd like to say in your own defence?
I mean ANYTHING.
At all.
'Cause really, what good is an inattentive, part-time, masochistic left hemisphere! I've already mentioned missing the "Valley" reference. Well there were a few other 'oversights' as well.

Note to self: ALWAYS read the fine print...

How did I miss the bit that says "this is a volunteer project and ALL visitors can choose between full days with the elephants (for an extra $60/day..) or 1/2 day with elephants and 1/2 day as slave labour (for an extra $30/day..)." 
Yes, that's right WE pay THEM to be allowed to cart the new, 2 metre long roofing panels of itchy, dry elephant grass down the hill to the kitchen hut and drag the old ant-filled ones back up.. 
We swept and we scrubbed and we watered.

We carted loads of chopped, sappy, heavy, ant-ridden lengths of banana trees UP the hill to a clearing in the jungle for the elephants afternoon tea.
Admittedly I was only doing the easier, horizontal leg by this stage, but there was a reason for that, which I'll get to soon...



Also seem to have missed the bit that says "we only have electricity from 6pm-9pm courtesy of a prehistoric & temperamental generator." 
The jungle is REALLY dark...in the dark.
And the bit that says "While the kitchen & lounge huts are near the top of the mountain, your cabins are built down the steep slope of the mountain side." Watch your step on the meandering, uneven, rock steps IN THE DARK....

All of this notwithstanding, it was nevertheless a truly wonderful experience.
The pictures say it better than my poor literary skills could, so here you are:

SUNSETS AND JUNGLE VIEWS

Kyra & Stevi at the top of the "Hill'...

Sunset from the Lounge Hut - Day 1...

Hey guys, is this sunset REALLY red or is it just my eyes - Day 2...

and Day 3 - we're still alive...

The roof of our hut - Ning Wan's Nest

Dear Nat in the hut's Lilliputian Doorway..

ELEPHANTS

this first lot are courtesy of Tara's creative genius...

And these are my slightly less impressive efforts...

Ning Wan, Mainet and Ruby reapplying their mudpacks...

Kyra & Nat splashing buckets of water over Ning Wan to help her wash off the old mud

Bob-the-Bastard scratching an itch...

and this is Bob's girlfriend, Onion..

THEN THERE WAS THE RIVER:
Yes, more of Tara's work...

AND THE WATERFALL:

Three Brilliant & Beautiful Babes...

Stevi, Nat & Kate....

And Yours truly...

Fortunately you can't really see the busted nose I'm sporting after an altercation with a strong and well placed vine that was laying, like a trip-wire across the path..
There I was walking along, minding my own business, watching an elephant dining on jungle take-away, when my foot was snared by this treacherous booby-trap and, since one hand was firmly in a pocket, did a magnificent face-plant with only 1 hand to break my fall. Needless to say it didn't stop my nose from smacking full force into the forest floor and only succeeded in adding a bruised wrist to the 2nd bloody nose I've ever had..a trail of blood was not what I had in mind when I said to "leave a trail" at the beginning of this adventure..
Five days later, the swelling's gone down, sneezing caused by the ever-present Cambodian dust is no longer taking me to new worlds of pain and I can, once again, breathe through both nostrils. Albeit through a slightly crooked nose.

Next Installment, we make it out of the jungle alive and land at Nature Lodge..

# 20: “ I'm an idealist. I may not know where I'm going, but I know I'm on my way..” - Carl Sandburg

Another Blog-slack fortnight...you know what? Just deal with it - I actually have a life now and it turns out living and doing stuff takes up a lot of time.

I have no idea what I was doing 2 weeks ago and since I'm off galavanting in the jungle with a disreputable and totally irresponsible bunch of Aussie Babes, I can't even check my work notes for clues. Add a night on the Red with 'a few' shots of Absinthe thrown in, courtesy of the aforementioned Babes, the half midi glass of Baileys, followed by the same amount of Jameson the barmaid just poured me when she discovered it was my birthday and I can barely remember this morning.

So moving right along to the standout, memorable moments of the past fortnight.
Chantha and I decided there was absolutely nothing unethical about bribing the kids, in the context of a monthly Encouragement Award for one child from each class - it was just in the form of an edible reward, ice cream, which they could choose for themselves, rather than your standard slip of totally INedible paper, declaring their prowess in "Good Listening" or "Being a Helpful Harry" or "Staying Awake" or even "Not Punching Everyone...as much".
So, 15 assorted Cornettos later and it's Annie's turn to choose. Having had more time to consider her options, she looked at me, said "ANY one?" then, with an encouraging nod from me, dived into the ice cream fridge and came out with a huge grin and a 1/2 litre tub of chocolate ice cream! And she ate it...ALL...although at 32°C , it was more like a chocolate thick shake by the time she finished it. What a sticky afternoon! 

 Next, our Philosophy Club. We had an interesting collection of thinkers, 4 or 5 Khmer & a dozen or so Barang (foreigners), American, Canadian, Belgian, British and Aussies  - good range of philosophers but perhaps not the best choice of topic :
"What's the best form of government?" - thanks Jedtha...
It started off philosopically enough, but degenerated into a 'corrupt-Hun Sen-Government-bashing' session which the Khmer participants were very vocal about at the time, but VERY nervous about later, as word spread of our 'seditious' discussion...
Perhaps something a little less inciteful next week...

 Then there was CCT's 'End-of-Year' party @ Tara's on Saturday 22nd. What a fun night. Open with games:
 'Target Practice' - this is basically throwing-paper-plates-full-of-whipped-cream-at-the-heads-of-your-teachers, who have, perhaps foolishly, built & painted a couple of 'teacher-size' chipmunks (Alvin & Theodore) and a 'Rambo' (a CCT dog not a crazed US soldier), with the oval of their faces cut out so the victims could poke their silly heads through.

It's a Jedtha-Monk !!

 Messy, but hilarious, followed by Pin the tail on the Donkey & Pass the Parcel. Now this seemed like an easy, trouble-free game. We'd spent a couple of hours the night before wrapping monster parcels with little gifts and coloured foil confetti between each layer. The kids were sitting in 2 HUGE circles on giant plastic tarps (for easy clean-up) and there were more than enough layers of gifts to go round.

Haute Couture - Battambang Style...
well, the kids seemed to find the 20 odd mini-pigtales amusing...

In fact, it all went smoothly.. until I got home and had a shower, only to discover that all those bits of pretty, bright coloured foil that were stuck to my legs were actually not foil at all. It seems the foil is dyed with some kind of indelible food colouring and the gold, purple, pink, blue & green splotches all over my legs were there for the next week...at least they didn't clash with my subtle fashion for the night.

Gangnam Style..

Great food, dozens and dozens of really excited kids, presents, a live band, lots of dancing - Daisy, Nacha & Tara on the stage dancing, Gangnam Style! Which all the kids were doing by the end of the night, with great passion, along with the inevitable funky Y M C A !! Some of these kids are really extraordinary dancers and they all love it!

The CCT boys jumped onto the stage to play a tribute to Tara...so sweet...

and the night wrapped up with a wonderful fireworks display that brought all the neighbours and their kids out as well. 




The following morning, after the CCT party, we managed to get on the 8.30am bus to Phnom Penh and our much anticipated week in the jungle..

..To be continued...